Why adults have extramarital affairs?
Talk about a loaded issue that no one wants to speak about, that’s it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on from the beginning of the world. Extramarital relationships can be loaded with problems, cause sadness, and other troubles. Plus you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety thing, funds, age difference, faith background, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I will define an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, married man date.
Why do women have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are men seeking an affair. I am sure typically though it is only the human condition, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Physically we as humans are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and exciting, and sex makes us escape the world for a short period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to switch the craving on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos people has erected against extra-marital affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will defeat their doubts and make them risk the wrath of not only their family, but the public also. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is horribly good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your family or anyone else? You would need to minimize the danger you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest grouping, colossal in fact. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they feel comfortable in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the children to look after. Your money are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that stop them implementing the sex operation, at least not with their othere half. An marital affair sometimes solves the problem while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Avoidance, sorrowfully this is a common reason I fear. One or the other, frequently the gentleman is sexually neglecting his female for a multitude of reasons. As a man I really appreciate you guys neglecting your girls and making them available to us males of romance, making them “hot milfs” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but evil.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe compassion is not here, maybe it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Could be we have just developed separately, our ordinary concerns diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposed to of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair